9 lange maanden zwanger met de meest bizarre zwangerschapskwaaltjes
Solita (35) wilde al zo lang als ze zich kan herinneren mama worden. Maar toen eenmaal haar droom uitkwam, had ze een behoorlijk pittige zwangerschap. Ze kreeg zo ongeveer de meest bizarre zwangerschapskwaaltjes die je kunt krijgen en het werden 9 lange maanden afzien voor haar. Lees hier haar zwangerschapsverhaal, (want niet elke zwangerschap gaat over rozen). Een steuntje in de rug voor iedere zwangere vrouw die het niet zo makkelijk heeft; ‘you’re not alone’.
I have been trying to conceive from mid 2018 (for 1,5 years) but unfortunately the result was always negative which made me sad. Specially my in-laws were giving me more pressure for conceive and always negative result. Due to this, I started getting panic, lost hope and different negative thought start arising on my mind which was too much to bear.
You understand that I could not be more happier when I got a positive result of my pregnancy test, but sadly this pregnancy ended up in a miscarriage. I thought I was never gonna get over this.
I thought my medical history was to blame for not getting pregnant. I fractured my L3-L4 in my back around 13-14 years ago. Doctors back then had advised me not to get pregnant because of the complications that I could get if I did get pregnant. After breaking my back I always had pains and I had the idea that my body was refusing to allow my body to prepare for conceiving. Although doctors told me it was better not to, I longed so much for having a baby I wanted to try to get pregnant.
But fortunately, I have a dear friend who helped me during this depressing period. She suggested Acupuncture. Through an article on the Mommy Knows Best platform that was about conceiving above the age of 40 I found the Fertility Acupuncture of Roslyn Go, where I had 3 sessions. And hurrraaaaa, on 17th January 2020 after 3 acupuncture visits the day finally came. I was pregnant again and now I felt complete.
I was super excited as if the baby would come the next day but within few weeks of pregnancy, I realized being pregnant isn’t an easy job. For the first trimester, due to all the hormonal changes, I had to spend most of my time in the bed. I was completely exhausted. It followed with morning sickness, nausea, head ache, pelvic pain and joint pain (which was way earlier according to my mid-wife) due to expansion of uterus and the emotions were heightened.
And I won’t forget this special friend; ‘the smell’, due to which I wasn’t able to enjoy anything that had some kind of smell. As soon as I eat a spoon with food, I couldn’t bare it anymore. Several times I was eating dinner with my nose inside a chips bag. Since, I wasn’t eating good, my energy was getting low and there was time when I had trouble even walking and standing. I was working in a shop and sadly because of these complications I had to quit work. This trimester was full of surprises, a day seemed like a year to me.
After all the exhausting but beautiful experience, I started seeing light as my second trimester started. The hormones were getting back to normal even though there were some physical changes underway. I started to resume my normal life to some extend with the smell (not completely) and headaches gone. I started eating, enjoying my pregnancy but who knew that my body is preparing itself for another attack (kidding).
Acute urinary retention
I was aware that due to expansion of uterus, I will get frequent urge to urinate which is normal. But all of a sudden, I could not urinate for the whole day and around evening, I started having pain. Initially, I held the pain thinking it will reside but as the time passed when I couldn’t even move it became alarming. I went directly to the ER but the GP said it was a urine infection so I came back with antibiotic. But that’s not over, after 2 hours returning from ER and dinner, the pain heightened 10 folds and a thought that I have to go to ER again otherwise I am going to die came to my mind. After an hour I reached ER and as soon as the GP saw me in pain, she had instinct that something serious is going on as she became aware that I am 4 months pregnant. She immediately referred me to gynecologist. As soon as the gynecologist performed ultrasound, the answer to the problem was in front of us.
Since I was drinking and could not urinating for the whole day, the bladder had expanded to its limit which was causing the pain. The gynecologist immediately called her assistant and used catheter to remove urine. As soon as the urine was out, I felt like being in heaven. Finally, I could think of my baby and baby is safe and sound inside the belly. I could get home but together with the catheter since peeing was still not possible for me.
For next few weeks, I spend visiting hospital for testing and routine checkups related to the urine infection. It was very bizarre that all the test result came negative and the doctors couldn’t determine what triggered the bladder to act in such a way. I had to use catheter for few weeks to urinate!
From week 20 onward, I was able to feel the baby’s movement which is a very strange experience as if my belly is an aquarium and the baby is swimming inside. As the pregnancy is progressing, I have been experiencing all the normal stuff that pregnant woman does. I just happen to have some extra. Talking about this extra experience during pregnancy, I started feeling itchiness on both side of my belly from my 23rd week, I searched and everyone said this is normal during pregnancy. But for me this isn’t going to be normal, the itchiness turned into red rashes and started spreading towards the whole body. I went to my GP and she said it’s because of the hormonal change and dryness of the skin so she suggested me to use some ointment which I did but wasn’t helping at all. After few days when I showed the spots and told about the itchiness to my gynecologist, she immediately referred me to dermatologist. The dermatologist thinks its eczema but I have 4 different kinds of red rashes followed by itchiness which she could not explain as well. So still suffering from the itchiness.
Every trimester brought different, unusual and unheard experience to me. So, with the beginning of this 3rd trimester, I was excited about my pregnancy and don’t know what surprise this period holds. As said earlier, the itchiness still lingers which was normal in some cases as I was told because the belly stretches out to its extreme. To cope with the itchiness, I used pregnancy cream which I have been using from the beginning but after a week something went horribly wrong with extreme itchiness under the breast and lower belly day and night. I couldn’t sleep and rest at all. So, I made an appointment with my GP to check what went wrong.
She told me the same as I said earlier, the drawback of being pregnant so she referred another cream but did not work at all and within 2 weeks I ended up trying three different creams without any effect.
By then I had appointment with my gynecologist. When she saw me scratching all over the body she told me I had to do a blood test. But we found nothin, there was no problem within me. So, she referred me to a dermatologist and I was provided with cream and medicine. After using this for a week, the situation remained unchanged even got worse. I spoke to the dermatologist again on the situation and was referred another medicine. I brought it home and checked on internet if this is good during pregnancy. The result I saw made me tremble. The medicine could do more harm than good. It was written “It cannot be used on the whole body and will affect the baby if used during pregnancy”. I called my gynecologist and discussed about it. The answer I got was that “they don’t have anything else for the situation so if I want, I can use the medicine or have to suffer like this for a while”, which came to me as a surprise.
Baby powder miracle
I decided not to use medicine but decided to use the Weleda baby powder that I bought few months ago when I had a fungus allergy. I combined it with cold shower twice a day. The miracle happened after a week. I felt the relief. Even though there were red patches here and there, there was no itchiness at all. I was super happy and thanking god for the miracle.
Now I finally started to enjoy my pregnancy by feeling the movements of the baby. I started feeling kicks, hiccups, rolling. I was very happy seeing the baby move. It feels like the baby is dancing and my belly is moving like a wave. But with happiness, I started getting angry sometimes. The baby is moving so much that it drains all my energy by the evening which started to make me annoyed. I still remember the first kick I had, I cried thinking not even my dad and husband had ever scolded me my entire life as far as I remember but my baby boy kicked me. But my husband made me calm so I started enjoying again. It seemed like someone envied my happiness during pregnancy. As I started enjoying, there came another issue out of nowhere.
Extra membrane in the placenta
Around 33-34 weeks, I started feeling sharp pain on right side of the belly and could not move. I thought it may be normal cramp but when it did not stop for more than 3-4 hours, I decided to go and see my mid-wife. She checks my bladder, urine, baby, cervix (assuming it may be early labor) but there was nothing. After close ultra sound observation, she saw an extra membrane in placenta which might have cause the pain. She made some snaps from ultrasound and said she is going to discuss it with gynecologist which we can discuss in our next meeting after a week. During this observation, the pain had already started to relief so I came back home knowing that there is no harm for my pregnancy and baby. She also made an appointment with ultra-sound specialist to observe more before my appointment with gynecologist. Luckily, the sharp pain faded away but the vigorous movement of the baby grew more day by day. So, I was experiencing pain good and bad ones here and there. A week passed by and found out from the ultra-sound that the extra membrane has disappeared but I could still feel mild pain here and there. And all this time the baby poking and kicking never stopped.
I felt super weak and sad with all the experiences and the fear of pain during labor. But I am surrounded with beautiful peoples who always supported and believed in me who turned the worst pain into a wonderful memory. Which reminds me that only being pregnant is not enough until there are people around who care for you. So, I am grateful toward all those beautiful souls.
As the delivery is approaching, I started having fear, anxiety and I was getting worried about me and the baby. A lot of unrealistic thoughts started. Thoughts about the work after birth, what kind of parents we are going to be, will we be able to fulfill the child’s need and so on. And of course, the belly is getting bigger day by day which was causing another problem for me. Initially my weight was 54 before pregnancy and now 69 (I am 1.57m). Since I am not used to this heaviness my entire life, I started having stress and angry because It was getting more and more difficult to move around or even do some simple chores. With this new situation, I just wanted to give birth and relax J. Everyone knows you can only relax in your dreams when you have a newborn.
Now I have reached a time where I can start preparing a birth plan and consult with my midwifes. During these consultations, I realize that you are treated as a VIP which was a culture shock for me. I got a lot of choices on how I want to give birth. You don’t have much of a choice where I come from (Nepal). Normally in my country a gynecologist decides everything for you and when you are 37 weeks pregnant it is time to go in labor. But during this appointment I was asked many questions but was also provided with the answers if I did not know.
Some of the inquiries were about kraamzorg. Kraamzorg is a person who comes into your house for almost 8 days in a row after delivery to help you get settled in your new life with baby, amazing and something I never heard of. They teach you everything single thing that you need to know about your baby.
I also had many doubts for which my midwife arranged an appointment with an employee from health department. During this consultation, the most shocking was allowing your partner to delivery room. Only medical personnel are allowed where I come from but here I can bring my husband along with me and even someone outside family. I found the environment very positive as well since I have heard of experience of others back home. Among them my elder sister her experience was the worst. My sister went for a routine check-up and the gynecologist decided to induce. During her labor, she was attended by trainee nurses. Even after many hours, they couldn’t get the baby out so they started using force by pressing the belly which causes her extreme pain. Luckily, a midwife with whom my mother was familiar with saw passed by, she explained the situation and duration of the labor. Looking at the situation, she replaced the nurses. After 15 minutes of that change, my sister gave birth to a beautiful boy. Due to this traumatic experience, she never thought of conceiving again. So, comparing at other’s experience, I am very optimistic nothing of such will happen to me.
I think few weeks more and I couldn’t wait to welcome the baby. In the meantime, I managed to prepare his nursery to keep myself busy so time flies by and I don’t have to think of things that I shouldn’t be concerned at the moment. Typically, there is always a question, how is life going to be after birth? There was all sort of million questions in my mind which I don’t want to think of. Whenever I get these kinds of thought, I get very nervous and scared which indirectly affects my mental and physical health. And of course, I am aware that is shouldn’t happen like that. I am not thinking of being a perfect parent but still. I am more concern at this moment on how life is going to turn out. I believe this is part of this journey where you experience lots of ups and downs within your own body as in life.
More pregnancy complaints
OMG the complains never ended. At the end of my pregnancy I started having pain on both side of hip. Due to which, I start having sleepless night because I had to turn left and right all the time during sleep. I also started having trouble walking due to hip pain. When I say this, I live on 3rd floor without a lift so I got confined inside the house. With all day movement of the baby and false contraction (painless) but sometime very painful, I start getting exhausted by the end of the day along with sleepless nights. It was getting harder day by day. At this time, I was waiting for contraction to happen but all of a sudden, I don’t want it to happen, since I start getting nervous, scared and stressed. Of course, I know that I should be feeling that during this stage but I couldn’t help myself to overthink about everything thing that is to come.
39 weeks (yelling at my husband)
Finally, a week to due date, false contraction were getting more often but I got panic as if I am not ready for the pain that is to come. With every contraction, I was yelling at my husband that I am not yet ready and don’t want to go to hospital. The anxiety level was so much high during this period. At one point in the night the contraction stayed for almost 6-7 hours and we ended up going to the hospital with the thought that today is the day. But it was a false alarm.
The week passed by and nothing happened. A day after the due date, I had appointment with the midwife. The pain was so extreme for me that me and my husband wanted to go for induction and give birth quickly as possible but the midwife didn’t see the need for it and asked us to wait for a week more. I had itchiness all over the body so she asked to do blood test to check if there is any medical reason to do induction. In the evening, the result came negative. So, we have to wait….
My husband insisted that we need to have consultation with gynecologist so midwife arranged an appointment after 3 days. At the appointment with gynecologist, as soon as I sat down, she said I have gone through a lot of difficulties and she is going to perform induction. She wants me to come the same evening. It was what I have wanted for last week. I was happy that it is going to happen but a strange feeling that she didn’t even ask if I am ok with it. She started calling the maternity ward for preparation but someone showed the symptom of COVID so it had to be next day. I was happy that I got time to get myself clean, do my nails, do my makeups. I always want to look pretty while giving birth.
So next evening, I went for induction. The nurse put a “Foley catheter” for induction and gave me morphine so I could sleep better at night since I will be needing a lot of energy tomorrow. In the morning when the nurse checked the cervix started dilation and it was already more that 2 cm. As the day passed, the progress was good since I was given Oxytocin for induction all the time so I was having contraction big one for the whole day. There was 4 contraction per 10 minutes. Everything seems going good but suddenly the dilation stopped so the midwife told me that I might need to go for cesarean. I never wanted it since I always want to have natural birth since I want to experience the pain and the feeling that you endure during birth. So, I decided against it and see couple of hours more.
During this time, the doses of Oxytocin was tripled and the strength of contraction got extremely strong. During this hour, I was given a pain reliefer Remifentanil which I could not take because of the side effect. The pain was extreme but I endured it with the focus in mind of normal delivery. After an hour, when the midwife check, I had extreme pain and the dilation decreased instead of increasing which broke me internally. Because, I tried everything I could and still I could do nothing. Seeing the situation, my husband convinced me for the cesarean. When he discussed with the midwife, she told us we have to wait for some more time and see if there is progress since there are more serious cases that need to be handled first. But to our surprise, after 15 minutes the midwife came along with gynecologist and said we are going for cesarean now.
After enduring more than 25 hours of pain from contractions, finally on Friday October 2nd, I gave birth to a beautiful boy after going through cesarean. He is 4.09 kg that’s the reason I had trouble having normal delivery. The Gynecologist told this to me after cesarean. They didn’t know this in advance because they did not took in account that our baby is Asian so has other head measures.
I have heard from friends and family about all the experience they had and heard of. But for me this pregnancy journey had been the one I think only few people had gone through. I went through experience everyone goes through like hormonal changes and difficulties that follows alongside to extreme itchiness because of stretching of skin. To my surprise, I did not have few things that are common during pregnancy like heartburn, swelling of hand and feet. To keep myself healthy, I started doing yoga and meditation. But when it started getting difficult due to growing baby, I bought a bouncing ball to help me with. Overall, I will say there were a lot of ups and downs during this pregnancy with loads of beautiful memory alongside. And finally ended with a beautiful and healthy baby.
With love Solita
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Liefs Team MOMMY KNOWS BEST